There’s a reason I said I’d be happy alone. It wasn’t ‘cause I thought I’d be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It’s easier to be alone, because what if you learn that you need love and you don’t have it? What if you like it and lean on it? What if you shape your life around it and then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It’s like dying. The only difference is death ends. This? It could go on forever.
We don’t speak much anymore, but it makes it impossible for me to ignore you or act like you don’t exist… It doesn’t help that I feel compelled to talk to you – to make conversation – just so that your existence remains connected with my world.
I just wish that when the time comes where your suppressed feelings come out that I’m the one hearing them, and not someone else.